So, you probably know by now that Parkinson’s is classified as a movement disorder. You don’t make dopamine, your brain can’t send messages to the rest of your body to do all those things you took for granted. You know, the little stuff like walking, talking, thinking…ah but stop dear reader. stop right there. its the thinking you see, that doesn’t stop, it changes language almost, but it doesn’t stop. Think of morse code, of semaphore. bBth ways of getting your message across but using a different language or more accurately, channel.
Increasingly I find my channels become muddied, the information losing its clarity as it passes through and escapes into the world outside. The principle of conservation of energy means that any energy expended to create my messages will be at the expense of the energy available to transmit said message. So as I have to work harder to be understood, I get more feeble - its been said elsewhere how cruel PD is. Well, I agree.
But, I don’t think my thoughts themselves are losing their quality. It’s the communication that’s the problem. I woke up this morning at 4.20am and then didn’t fall back asleep. Instead I listened to one of my favourite podcasts, it doesn’t matter which. The point was, I had a good idea, it was brilliant (well, to me) and as I played with it in my mind, I almost saw it falter as I tried to articulate it. The energy seeped away and with it went my idea. pouf! And this post is the exoskeleton.